THE DISCOVERY OF JESUS FORSAKEN IN THE EARLY DAYS

Natalia Dallapiccola

I’ve been asked to say something about how we understood Jesus forsaken in the early days.

We were one heart with Chiara in living the Gospel together.
Yes, because God had manifested himself as Love and we wanted to respond with our love. So we lived the words of the Gospel.
When we discovered the prayer of Jesus’ Testament: “Father, may all be one as you and I are one” we asked ourselves how we would be able to live this unity because we felt called to accomplish it.

One day Dori, one of Chiara’s first companions, was ill and because she wanted to receive the Eucharist, Chiara accompanied a priest to her house so that he could bring it to her.
This priest asked Chiara: “When do you think Jesus suffered the most?”
Chiara answered, thinking of what people said at that time, that it was when Jesus was in Gethsemane , when he foresaw his passion.
But the priest said to her: “No, it was when Jesus cried out on the cross: ‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me’” (Mt 27:46).
When the priest left, Chiara said to Dori:
“If Jesus suffered the most when he felt forsaken on the cross, that is also the moment he loved the most, because he suffered and died out of love. We – continued Chiara – have already discovered and understood a little that God loves us immensely. If Jesus expresses his greatest love in that cry, we choose Jesus forsaken on the cross as the ideal of our life.”

Then Chiara understood that Jesus in his abandonment was the “key” to unity. That is, she understood that if we had made Jesus forsaken the ideal of our life, we would be able to accomplish unity and respond with our love to the cry of Jesus forsaken.

This meant embracing every physical or spiritual suffering because each of these sufferings was a countenance of him.
So in the face of every suffering we said in our heart: “This is what I want, because you are forsaken.”
And in this way we passed on from suffering to love, to full joy. It was like a divine alchemy.

Now we realize that for all of us who followed and follow this spirituality, Jesus forsaken has become the solution to all problems and to every suffering.

I’ll tell you my first experience.
I still remember very vividly the morning after I made the choice of Jesus forsaken.
Usually, when I woke up the first thoughts that came to my mind were the difficulties I would encounter that day: in the family, at work, in relationships with people, in my incapacity to do God’s will well. And it would frighten and oppress me.
That morning, instead, these problems were illuminated; I saw them all as aspects of him forsaken to love. And during the day, trying to live in this way, I experienced that everything was filled and in the place of suffering there was love. Ever since then, every morning I renew this choice.

And now too.
At times, Jesus forsaken presents himself differently than what I expected, but it’s enough that I understand that it is a suffering and so it is him and I must embrace him.
The experience I constantly live is that the more I love him, the more I learn to recognize him and to love him.